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Nathan

Catastrophes

Daily Post

Last Christmas Eve just after dark, without warning, there was a power cut in our neighbourhood.

In our house our whole evening changed. Plans for a festive dinner and a movie were abandoned. We made sandwiches by torchlight and ate them nestled under blankets. We read with candles and kept busy with little jobs so that we didn’t think too much.

When I did think I could only worry and imagine the worst. What if the power didn’t come back on? Would everything in our fridge and freezer be ruined? Would we be able to celebrate Christmas the next day?

Over the course of a few hours the power kept coming back on and then shutting off abruptly. Then it stayed off again for a long time.

What now? What should we do?

For half an hour I just panicked. Then by torchlight I got out my notebook and wrote:

We’re fortunate enough to have torches. The power will get fixed at some point. We’re fortunate enough that we could buy more food if needed. We can still find a way to celebrate. We can find other options. It’s not ideal but we can figure it out. We will still have Christmas.

I felt better. I didn’t know what was going to happen, but I knew that whatever did happen we could do something.

Moments later the power came back on and stayed on. I felt a little anxious for the next few hours that it would go off suddenly, but the problem was resolved. We went to bed and the next day was Christmas, just as we’d planned.

 

On Christmas Eve I was catastrophising the situation. Something went wrong, suddenly, and all I could do was imagine the situation getting worse and worse.

The power cut hit me out of the blue, completely unexpected, but for the viva some potential situations can be anticipated. And depending on how you view things, you could believe that you have a future catastrophe. What would you do?

You could forget something.

Your examiners could ask a tough question.

You could doubt yourself.

There could be a delay.

And so on. Lots of things could happen. They could happen. They might not. And even if they do they’re not totally beyond your power to resolve or do something about.

A delay could be uncomfortable, but you could find a way to use the time. If you doubt yourself at any point then you can find a way to remember the contribution you’ve made in your thesis and the talent you’ve developed as a researcher. A tough question or a forgotten detail will not disqualify you from achieving your PhD; taking a moment to think is probably all you need.

Expected and unexpected “catastrophes” are not always as terrible as they first appear. A problem or situation may not be as dire as it seems. Even when confronted with a tricky situation you have the talent and knowledge to do something.

Nathan

Catastrophising

Daily Post

One day in January, around 5pm, I noticed our house was getting cold.

I checked, and realised the boiler wasn’t on. I tried a few things and realised it wouldn’t come on. I called our boiler service people, they talked me through a few checks and realised there was nothing I could do: someone would have to come and see it.

“OK, we aim to get someone out within 24 hours; we’ll be in touch as soon as possible,” said the helpful person on the phone. This was around 5:30pm.

I started imagining…

Well. 24 hours. So the house is going to be cold all night. No showers. OK, kettles to fill a shallow bath. Hot drinks. Where’s our electric heaters? Hot water bottles for bedtime. Blankets, get all the blankets out. OK. OK… Don’t panic. It might not be fixed tomorrow. So what do we do? Stay with mum? Stay with sister? Maybe. OK. What about work? Nevermind work, what about money? The central heating is broke, BROKE, the boiler won’t fire… How much is a new boiler? How long will it take?? How long will I be paying for it on the credit card???

Ring-ring. It’s now 6pm. “Hi, this is the boiler guy! I should be with you by 7!”

So he’ll be here soon. But it’s going to be expensive. Well. OK, seriously, don’t panic. Don’t panic. Disrupted evening, late night, but I’m not out tomorrow. We’ll be fine, we can do this. We always find a way to make it work… But I suppose I’d best pack things up in the office, as the boiler is in there, and when they have to replace the boiler I’ll need to work somewhere else for at least a few days I think-

Knock-knock. It’s now 6:45pm. “Let’s take a look… Oh, did this happen? … Right, and let’s try this… OK, there’s the problem! All done! No problem, bye!”

It’s 7:10pm. All sorted. No fuss, no headache, no drama and no more cold as the radiators start pumping out heat again.

Sometimes, something goes wrong and before you know it, you’re imagining the outcome is going to be awful. It can feel impossible to put the brakes on the runaway train of catastrophes that lurch ahead in your brain. If you don’t know what the problem is, all you have are questions. If you don’t know the exact answer, all you can do sometimes is imagine it’s the worst possible option.

In your viva, it’s entirely possible that your examiners won’t like something, or won’t agree with you, or aren’t sure about a choice you’ve made. It’s natural for there to be typos, or paragraphs that don’t communicate what you want, or ideas that can be challenged. And none of them are necessarily catastrophic: in some cases, you won’t know what’s motivating the questions or resistance or different opinion. And in the absence of that information, your brain instantly jumps to catastrophe.

So: ask questions to get answers.

If your examiners say they found mistakes, don’t worry straight away: ask them where and ask them why. If they don’t agree with something, ask them why, so you know what you need to respond to. If they aren’t sure about something, ask what they would need to be convinced. You may need to do nothing to resolve the situation.

As with my boiler “catastrophe” you might realise there is nothing you can do but wait, listen and try not to obsess.