I spent a few months in the second year of my PhD trying to solve one calculation.
I stopped after seven weeks.
I had written and rewritten tortured sequences of symbols. I had found simpler ways to write things. I had noticed helpful formulations that made things easier to see. And I had an idea of what might actually be going on with my mathematical puzzle even if I couldn’t prove it.
Maybe I sound upbeat now but I was not thinking positively about it at the time.
In the summer of 2006 I was frustrated, tired, stuck and only seeing the seven weeks as wasted:
- I had hundreds of sheets of handwritten notes that didn’t show an answer.
- I had disappointed myself and I was sure that I had disappointed my supervisor.
- I didn’t even know at that point if I was on track to finish my PhD.
I could only see the negatives.
It took time for me to find a different way of looking at things:
- I didn’t have an answer but I had progress.
- I hadn’t solved this problem but I had found new methods.
- I had shown that some ideas weren’t good ones.
- And I had a new hypothesis even if I couldn’t show it.
If you find yourself, like me, in a situation where you can only find the negatives in your research then you need to take a step back and really reflect.
It won’t all be bad.
Limitations and setbacks can still lead to progress. Failure can become success. It might not be the success you were expecting, it might be smaller or different, but it still counts for something.
If you’re struggling to frame your work in a positive way then take some time to reflect, particularly as you get ready for your viva.
You have to convince yourself that you’ve made a contribution before you can convince your examiners.